Cutlural Seminar

We had a "Cultural seminar" for me the other day. It was helpful: there was a little skit about some Americans visiting a family's house and the faux pas they committed, ones they might not even be aware of. Greetings are very important. You greet everyone in the room, even if you don't know them. Its an honor for someone to have you eat in their house, so it's a slight if you decline their proffered food. Floors are dirty, so don't put your stuff there, especially not a Bible (which shouldn't really go on the floor anywhere). And it's really rude to speak in English to another American when your hosts don't know what you're saying.

Another part of the cultural seminar involved talking about a lot of different aspects of the culture. Time, money, people, family loyalty, dating, beliefs about health, social interactions. I was especially taken with the part about husbands and wives. I'd known before that wives are generally servants to their husbands, needing permission to vary their routine and having to do whatever they are told. I felt sadness at the abuse that many women and young girls experienced at the hands of their husbands and fathers. What I didn't know was the long term ways these interactions played out.

Actually, in a home, the mother is boss. Her children will listen to what she says, and as a father's physical ability to control his children decreases (as they get older) so does the respect they hold for him. Grandfathers aren't important. They are tolerated, but generally ignored. Mothers and grandmothers, on the other hand, are ultimately important, and men of 50 will still say they need to do something because their mothers want them to do so.

I wonder how many young boys say they aren't going to be like their fathers. I wonder how many young girls get married or move in with their boyfriends (often when they're as young as 13) to escape the tyranny of their fathers, only to have the cycle repeated in their own lives. I wonder how many men try to hard to retain control, only to see it slip away from them, along with the honor and respect they desire, as they grow older. I wonder how many wives outwardly obey their husbands, but quietly undermine his authority in their home, as a way to get revenge for his lack of care or his abuse.

There are some Christian young people in our church, and I would really like to talk to them about these issues. I'd like to know how the married couples operate in a different manner than the cultural norm. I'm also wondering how the single Christian view dating relationships and marriage. Since they're living a counter-cultural lifestyle, how has that been difficult and how has it been life-giving.

So many interesting questions and things to think about!